basically.

How/why do we forget that just like when we were little sometimes an ice cream cone really can make you feel better?
This was a major moment for me today. I have had a string of not so wonderful, mostly exhausting days and today was the first day I got to take an actual lunch break outside of the store and I gave myself an extra treat of an ice cream cone which I've done maybe once ever and I swear to you I was a different person about four licks in.
That's all it took and I was back in the game. Good to know.
Things have been moving ridiculously fast. The fact that we're a week into July seriously blows my mind.
In one of my last posts, I mentioned that I ha lived a lot of life in just a week and it hasn't really slowed down. In fact, it just sped up. So much so, I really haven't even wrapped my head around it as I sit here trying to decide if I'm ready to go there or not. I'm not
But, I will summarize a few things I've done.
First of all, I realized about a week ago that in the last year, I've lost 30 pounds. About 20 of which since January. I haven't really been making an effort as far as dieting or introducing a new work out regimen, like I mentioned not so long ago, I just started giving a shit about myself. I don't see it at all other than the belt I've been wearing for years is now buckled on the last notch, four away from where I used to wear it and my "skinny" jeans are now saggy in the butt and have to be worn to my belly button with said belt. Feeling really cute lately but just haven't felt like trying to find new clothes just yet. not to mention time but I'm ready to stop beating that one into the ground.
In that Augusten book I was telling you about, he talks about weight issues an he pretty much nails it. If you take pressure off of yourself and just live how you want to live and reasonably, it stops being an issue. I kind of just proved it. Also, I am willing to argue that some of the weight that is no longer accounted for on my bathroom scale is baggage I've rid myself of. Because that's the only thing that has made me feel lighter.
The other thing, I quit smoking. Again. I pretended to be a closet smoker for about a year after quitting for several months. And in that year, I got bronchitis three times. I got the message. It has been hard, but also easy. I probably will puff on a cig from time to time but I definitely don't want to be a smoker again. I've been amazed at the money that's been left in my bank account and just feel better in general. Really glad to have that off my to-do list.
So, that's kind of where I'm at. Crazy busy with work and life and death, but still able to move forward. That's a really powerful thing to learn. I'm the queen of bullshit excuses and I've finally run out of them or just gotten tired of making them. There's always time to make shit happen, if you really want it.
I think that's the real question to ask yourself.
So, basically, ice cream does fix things sometimes and excuses never will.