i've fallen and..

so, i've developed this fear that's honestly getting increasingly worse. it's of dying alone in my house and not being discovered until kitty has eaten half of my face off for her own survival. no, for real.
a couple weeks ago due to sickness, i almost passed out in the shower. i was frantic. flashes of my nightmare. i got out as fast and carefully as i could. now, i'm thinking of installing geriatric hand rails in my bathroom to ensure safe exit. i'll be getting grippers for my tub on my next target trip.
others are just random, i'll have some sort of accident and immediately my brain will begin creating worst case scenarios about how if i would've just tripped two inches to the left closer and hit my head there or fallen into the oven or... i would die. it's gotten a little insane.
however, i have thought of several reasons why it's a good thing i live alone.
1. attempting to do yoga. it is the most pitiful sight one could probably see.
2. due to my yoga attempts, i apparently do have a "core" and it hurts, pretty bad. moments ago while watching "new girl" i was caught off guard by something really funny and i busted out laughing and it hurt. so bad. that i then proceeded to make a really painful noise laugh thing in the most contorted position/face i have ever imagined myself to make.
3. i sing while i clean my house. i had a mild obsession with pearl jam last week and began singing everything like eddie vedder. i didn't realize this until i stopped looked up and saw kitty making the most judgmental face a creature with no lips could make.
4. i can wear the same jammies every single day cause they're my favorite and no one will ever know. also, no one has to know that the first thing i do when i walk in the door is put them on.
5. um, actually, i can do whatever i want and no one can judge me. except for kitty, apparently. but, i mean, although i rarely admit this, she is, after all, just a cat.

so, i may go ahead and order a life alert just in case, you know, a worst case scenario nightmare does come true. i mean, this face is too cute to not be an open casket. but, in reality, i should really relish this time to do what i want when i want how i want, because, hopefully, that won't be the case for the rest of my life.